Parenting Teens

Halloween with teenagers can be tricky. Are they too old for trick-or-treat? Should they simply stay home and hand out candy? What kind of trouble could they get into if they go out with friends?

Actually, there are really good Halloween activities for teens. Sometimes, it just takes a little more work. Personally, I don’t find anything wrong with teenagers going trick-or-treating, as long as they’re well-behaved. I enjoy seeing their costumes at my door just as much, and sometimes more than, those of younger children. However, this particular activity is up to the teen, the parents, and the attitude of the neighborhood in general!

If the school, church or a local civic organization is having a party, fall festival or some other type of celebration that your teen wants to attend, you’re all set! There are also volunteer opportunities for teenagers to help out at parties and festivals for younger children, and if your particular teen is into that kind of thing, great!

A lot of teens (like their younger siblings) just want to have some fun on Halloween night. Who can blame them? After all, what other time of year can you dress like one of your favorite characters and not be talked about (in a negative way) at school the next day?! A good Halloween party is the best bet to make sure that teenagers have fun and stay safe

You’ll notice I said a “good” Halloween party, which is, usually, a lot different for teens than for younger children. This means letting the teen take care of most of the party planning. Your teen knows his/her friends and what they enjoy. You may not like some of the things your teen chooses to do but, unless you find them totally unacceptable, bite your tongue and let them have the party their way.

One sure bet is that they will want music-loud music-and lots of it! Let them choose their own. You may not like listening to it, but you can stand it for one night, can’t you? After all, don’t you, from time to time, force them to listen to your music, at least on the car stereo?

Horror movies are another great bet. Some teens may like the original classics, such as “Dracula,” “Frankenstein,” “The Wolfman,” or any number of others. Then there’re the classics like “Halloween,” “Nightmare on Elm Street,” and “Friday the 13th.” More recent fare includes movies like “Scream,” “The Ring,” and “The Grudge.” There’s a ton of great movies out there for Halloween. Your local video store will usually have an entire section devoted just to horror. One idea that my teenage daughter has used is to provide a selection of different movies, and allow her guests to vote for their favorites at the beginning of the party.

Lots of teens will also want video games at a party. Now, obviously, there’s lots of controversy about video games and the violence they contain these days. If you, or the parents of some of your teen’s friends are worried about this, you might want to allow games, but restrict the more violent ones. BB, over at 1pstart.com has some great game reviews. Or ask at your local game store. Video games are usually big hits at my daughter’s parties.

Of course, you’ll want lots of food! There’s plenty of staples like popcorn, chips, etc., but have some interesting Halloween goodies too. Red punch with floating candy eyeballs and gummy worms is terrific! So are homemade spiders, bats and various “body parts.” You’ll find some good recipes at “Halloween Recipes.”

Decorating for the party is actually one of the fun parts-if you like this kind of thing. (It’s a lot more fun putting spider webs up, than sweeping them down!) You can make it as simple or elaborate as your teen wants. There are lots of department and party stores out there with everything you can possibly imagine and more! You can have witches, skeletons, bats, spiders, mummies, coffins-anything! Just take a quick tour through a party store at this time of year and you’ll be amazed! Decorating is limited only by your budget and imagination.

A good costume contest is often a great idea for a teenager’s Halloween party. Most teens are imaginative and creative when it comes to costumes. They do everything from movie and TV characters to the old standards like Dracula and ghosts. I always enjoy seeing the costumes at my daughter’s parties. Give out gag gifts for the winners. There’ll usually be a couple of teens who wouldn’t show up at a party in costume for anything in the world. Make them part of the action by designating them the judges for the contest. Everyone will have lots of laughs and a good time.

One of the most important things you, as a parent, can do at a teen party is stay out of the way, as much as possible. One of the great things about a party is that it can be chaperoned and supervised, but if a parent stays right there all the time, the kids won’t have fun. Help get things started and then disappear. You can stick your head in occasionally, to see if anything’s needed but, unless something is going on that shouldn’t be-STAY OUT OF IT! Let them have their own fun. That’s the purpose of the party, after all.

Personally, I’m a big fan of Halloween. I love horror movies. I love decorating for Halloween. I also love going to haunted houses, and being scared to death! But I try to let my teenage daughter have her own fun You’ll find that you can give teens some freedom at Halloween, without them taking advantage of it.